11:11

11:11. They said I could make a wish. So whenever I catch the clock hitting 11:11, I'd say your name. More like a prayer than a wish. I'd only stop whispering your name when it hits 11:12. You'd think I was crazy and being all voodoo-like but for someone as shy as me, who freezes and gets tongue-tied in your presence, this is my appeal to the cosmos, my attempt to rally the universe behind my cause. And that is, for you to take notice of me. Besides, I'm a girl and a girl can only do "first moves" so much.

I don't think it's working either. Well, there was one time when we passed by each other in the corridors and you gave me a half-smile and I smiled back. It took all my strength not to swoon/scream right then and there. But that doesn't mean anything to you I know. Other than that, nada. Come to think of it, I rarely even see you. And if I do see you, it would be around two seconds and then, you're gone again. Five seconds max. Elusive, like the golden snitch.

There are days when I feel okay. Newsflash: I don't think about you every second. Moments when I forget that you exist and I'm just so caught up with whatever it is I'm doing like work, like writing or reading. On days when your absence is prolonged, my heart calms down and it doesn't look for you. But then, because fate is really mean, those 2-sec sightings happen and my heart is again thrown into a frenzy. It becomes greedy and looks for you everywhere; wants everyone to be you. Then I won't see you again for a long time and it's calm. Until I see you again. And the cycle of heart attacks begins again.

I don't know how this came to be. It was just a simple crush. But then, I made the mistake of saying it out loud, told my friends about it and before I knew it, voila, full blown Superbass whenever you pass by.

I'm writing this because...I don't know. Because, maybe, it's hard to say it, hard to tell you, in person. I needed to get it off of my chest. Tell you about it somehow before the forces of nature spirit me away to my most awaited adventure. My last attempt to send the message across without having to open my mouth, literally. And, mind you, this is the closest to a confession you're gonna get. So there.